We make absolutely no claims of any cure for any disease. We make no claims that any product found on our website will treat or cure any condition. Although for the significant majority hypnosis is quite safe and very effective as a therapeutic resolution for many physical and mental ailments, any person suffering from mental health problems such as Schizophrenia, Psychosis. Delusional Disorder, or Multiple Personality Disorder should not be hypnotized by a lay Hypnotherapist (non-medically trained) without a referral from the subject's doctor or another qualified mental health practitioner. Nobody should ever be advised to discontinue the use of prescribed medications without the same qualified approval.
Text Box: Dr. Nikki currently has a weekly column called "Ask Dr. Nikki". It appears in three California newspapers. Each week she answers teen’s questions about things of such national concern as school violence and as personal as how to handle a disloyal friend. The issues reflect items found in the news or simply respond to individuals personal needs as expressed in letters they write to "Ask Dr. Nikki". She is also the developer and facilitator of corporate training in: Strategies for Coping with Stress, Stop Smoking and Success for the Diet Dropout: Health and Fitness for Women Who Want to Stop Hating their Bodies. She is available for private office sessions and long-distance sessions. Call 888-755-9229 to book a private office session with Dr. Nikki.  Text Box: Dear Nikki,    I have been making myself throw up every meal for the past month.  I feel like I don't look good enough for my boyfriend.  He has pornography laying around his house.  I am jealous about all of the other females that he looks at, and I am trying to get to the size that I think he wants me to be. I know that this is dangerous, but I don't know how to stop and still feel comfortable about the weight that I will gain.  My boyfriend stresses how much he likes the way that I look, but I just can't believe him.  Please help. J.B. Dear J.B., Bury your perfectionism before it buries you. Otherwise you’ll end up with a good looking corpse. Bulimia can kill you if you don’t stop. Get a clue about your boyfriend. It’s hard to believe he likes your looks because his words say one thing and his actions say another. Flashing looks at other girls in front of you is disrespectful to you. It feeds his ego. Do you really want a guy whose that insecure? When I was in my early twenties, a good friend helped set me straight about my body size. I’ll pass the conversation on to you. Me. “Men aren’t going to like me because I’m so fat.” Andi. “I can’t believe you think that”. Me. “It’s true. Men like slim women” Andi. “That’s crazy” Me. “Look at you. You have a boyfriend and you’re skinny” Andi. “Yeah but you don’t realize how self-conscious I am about my body. My hip bones stick out and I’m always afraid I’m poking them when we kiss. Look at you. I bet men love to hold you cause you’re so soft and cuddly ”. I was shocked. She saw a positive where I’d only seen negative. After that talk, I stood proud of my body. It was amazing how many men suddenly became attracted to me because now I believed they could be. Climb a few steps up the mountain and things will look different from that vantage point. If you can’t stop throwing up your meals after learning this, get professional help before it’s too late. When ever you think your looks aren’t enough, remember this quote, "Common looking people are the best in the world: that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them." -John Hay Nikki Goldman Ph.D. Put your body image in perspective with Dr. Nikki’s book, Success for the Diet Dropout: Proven Strategies for Women Who Want to Stop Hating Their Bodies. Purchase it at www.Amazon.com. Dr. Nikki uses hypnosis on children and adults for self-esteem and behavior changes in her California office. Dear Dr. Nikki I am a 20-year-old mother of two, still with the father of the children.  Were happily married and love both of our children.  We have come along ways as teenage parents, and beat the odds against us.  I’m a college student working towards a child development career.   Tonight I took a pregnancy test and, it came out positive.  I’m lost in my thoughts thinking of abortion, while also thinking of what if I had done that with the previous two.  I couldn’t imagine them not in my life, but also couldn’t imagine having another child, when we have already came so far.  It is hard enough raising two while going to school.  I’m just looking for some advice in this time of confusion. BV Dear BV, Perhaps adoption is an option you haven’t thought of. Counseling will help you decide. Contact an agency that provides it free of charge to pregnant women. Two such national agencies are Children’s Home Society and Planned Parenthood. If you prefer the self-help method and can get on line, go to www.adoption.com. You will find others who are considering it. There are also abortion forums; both pro-choice and pro-life. Use google or an other search engine and you’ll find many of both. Feedback from others who have chosen each option will help you sort through your own feelings and needs. Confusion is part of getting to clarity. Relax into the process by brainstorming all the possibilities. For example, write down all that comes to mind about how you’ll feel with abortion the immediately afterward, five years from now and 20 years from now. Do the same with adoption or parenting the child. What are the benefits and consequences to you, your husband and your children. There may be a difference between what you want and what is in your highest good for you and your family. The highest good comes from the wisdom of knowing what truth is in your heart. It may hurt, but you will know it is right. No one can tell you what that is. The trick is to have courage to face it. Questions you can ask yourself; Can you give enough to your other two children if there is a third demanding your time and energy. Will it be fair to them to spread yourself too thin? On the other hand will it be fair to eliminate the opportunity for them to have another brother or sister. Black and white thinking dictates there is one truth and one thing that is right. Don’t let others prejudices decide what is right for you. Life’s music has both dissonant and harmonious sounds. Don’t be afraid to listen to your song.   Dear Dr. Nikki I worry about everything. I used to think that everyone did until my friends kept telling me that I worry too much. I’m always thinking about whether my boyfriend still likes me or whether I studied enough for a test. I’m always imaging the worst, like what if I lose my key and I can’t get into my house after school or what if I don’t get into the college I want. Sometimes it is so bad, that I feel like I’m immobile and can’t do anything. Is there anything I can do to change this? Fretting Franny  Dear Fretting, The first thing is do nothing! Take a vacation from so much “doing”. With relaxation pressures won’t be as intense and things will look different. You can either fall prey to being forced into doing nothing by becoming immobile, or you can head it off at the pass and take some relaxation before it takes you. Decide on a hobby or go to the beach or the movies. Find something where the end result doesn’t matter. Take the pressure off performance.  There’s a story about two guys sitting around on a skateboard park bench. Kyle is holding a jar of bee’s and watching them swarm around. Jon notices there’s no way for the bees to breath. He tells Kyle he’d better poke some holes or the bees will die. Jon replies, “so they’ll die. It’s just a hobby”. The point is that you need something that doesn’t matter. It sounds like you create meaning in everything you do.  As long as you’re playing the “what if” game, Let’s play it in a new way. What if it didn’t matter if you lost your key? What if you realized you could climb in the window, or maybe that girl around the corner whose been inviting you over that you haven’t had time to spend time with is home. What an opportunity that would not have been there had you been so perfectly organized and had your key. What if when you went over there, her older brother was there and he was sooo cute and he asks you out on a date.  Absurd? Not really. It’s called Serendipity. When you go with the flow of the life, and let things happen that you can’t control, it gives your destiny a chance to step in. You may be headed to things greater than you imagined.  If your anxiety is extreme and changing your thought processes are not enough, there are some natural remedies that may help. Go to your health food store and ask for a book on homeopathic remedies or herbs for anxiety. Explore how these may work for you.  With the combination of these two, you can turn anxiety into excitement. They are both opposite ends of the same coin.        Dear Dr. Nikki, Now that the newness of school is worn off, my daughter has begun to lose her motivation. Aside from her lack of interest, she finds it difficult to concentrate. Do you have any suggestions for both of these problems? Motivated Mom Dear Motivated, What motivates one person will not necessarily motivate another. One may fear the consequences of not doing well while another may look forward to the rewards they get when they shine. The external prize, such as money or a gift for good grades may light a fire under your daughter or she may seek the internal satisfaction instead. The trick is in finding the key that starts her engine. There’s a famous radio station with the call letters, WII-FM. These letters stand for ‘what’s in it for me’. There is always something of value in everything we do or we wouldn’t do it. What is the value for her in getting her work done? If there’s no pleasure in the actual work, perhaps she can tell herself the sooner she gets it done, the sooner she can get on to fun things. Help her explore past times when motivation came naturally. If she was swept up in the excitement of the newness, she’ll need to find something she can count on more consistently.  Habits go a long way to helping accomplish things. Chances are she doesn’t need motivation to brush her teeth each day. (Teens discovery of their attraction to the opposite sex does have its merits!) The habit puts her on automatic pilot. She does it without thinking about it and without conscious effort. Try this with homework. Set aside a particular time of day and teach her to habituate to it.  We all have things in life we wish we didn’t have to do. Why are some able to get through the unpleasantness easily while others procrastinate and sink into apathy and become ineffective? Research shows that successful people project into the future and imagine what it will be like when the task is finished. This keeps their enthusiasm going until they can get on to more joyful times. Explain this to your daughter and ask her to try it. To improve concentration, try this simple trick. Have her play Baroque music softly in the background while she studies. Research shows these compositions create a unique and interesting physiological response in people. It slows the heartbeat to 60 beats per minute and slows the brain waves down too. More of the whole brain is engaged. The result…less distraction and a stronger focus of attention.  Put your body image in perspective with Dr. Nikki’s book, Success for the Diet Dropout: Proven Strategies for Women Who Want to Stop Hating Their Bodies. Purchase it at www.Amazon.com. Dr. Nikki uses hypnosis on children and adults for self-esteem and behavior changes in her California office. To ask Dr. Nikki a Question, EMAIL US.

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This page was last updated on: 6/5/2008